java rockin land baby!!

Blood Red Shoes – Say Something Say Anything

the letters are held tight
a fucking theft in broad daylight
coz he was strong, and tried to be wise
a plain man with a simple life
the photos sit on their chest
i can’t find what i want in them yet
the seamless phone calls
build bridges when you wanna build walls

well you all said nothing about this tonight
yeh you all said nothing about this tonight
well you all said nothing about this tonight
yeh you all said nothing about this tonight

well it’s left a gaping hole
a space i can’t fill on my own
so what’s left to be said?
and who’s there to take good care?
for us, and for her
to lead on and ease what hurts
to take sides, to take pride, to fight through disguise and lies?

well you all said nothing about this tonight
yeh you all said nothing about this tonight
well you all said nothing about this tonight
yeh you all said nothing about this tonight

so tell me – how long, how long, how long can you miss someone?
how long, how long, how long do you miss someone?
how long, how long, how long can you miss someone?
how long can you miss someone?
how long can you miss someone?
how long can you miss someone?

java rockin land baby!!…he3 new project new laptop, i celebrate it by coming to this event :D
at first i only interested to watch 30 second to march, but just before their concert next to their stage i pick up cool tunes played by a unique band..i say unique because it only has 2 person on their group, a (pretty) girl on guitar, and a boy on drum (well, not so unique then since the white stripes has the exact opposite formation) :p
but their song is harmonious, even though they only jamming with 2 instrument.. anyway, cool show (by them and also 30 second to march) bought myself a nice t-shirt..and funny thing, at the end of java rockin land, i met with some old friends..remembering the situation it was a huge amount of croud, and still we’re passing by each other..nice!! :D
java rockin land baby!!

Every Tear Drop Is A Waterfall

Every Tear Drop Is A Waterfall
By: Coldplay

I TURN THE MUSIC UP, I GOT MY RECORDS ON
I SHUT THE WORLD OUTSIDE UNTIL THE LIGHTS COME ON
MAYBE THE STREETS ALIGHT, MAYBE THE TREES ARE GONE
I FEEL MY HEART START BEATING TO MY FAVORITE SONG

AND ALL THE KIDS THEY DANCE, ALL THE KIDS ALL NIGHT
UNTIL MONDAY MORNING FEELS ANOTHER LIFE
I TURN THE MUSIC UP
I’M ON A ROLL THIS TIME
AND HEAVEN IS IN SIGHT

I TURN THE MUSIC UP, I GOT MY RECORDS ON
FROM UNDERNEATH THE RUBBLE SING A REBEL SONG
DON’T WANT TO SEE ANOTHER GENERATION DROP
I’D RATHER BE A COMMA THAN A FULL STOP

MAYBE I’M IN THE BLACK, MAYBE I’M ON MY KNEES
MAYBE I’M IN THE GAP BETWEEN THE TWO TRAPEZES
BUT MY HEART IS BEATING AND MY PULSES START
CATHEDRALS IN MY HEART

AND WE SAW OH THIS LIGHT I SWEAR YOU, EMERGE BLINKING INTO
TO TELL ME IT’S ALRIGHT
AS WE SOAR WALLS, EVERY SIREN IS A SYMPHONY
AND EVERY TEAR’S A WATERFALL
IS A WATERFALL
OH
IS A WATERFALL
OH OH OH
IS A IS A WATERFALL
EVERY TEAR
IS A WATERFALL
OH OH OH

SO YOU CAN HURT, HURT ME BAD
BUT STILL I’LL RAISE THE FLAG

OH
IT WAS A WA WA WA WA WA-ATERFALL
A WA WA WA WA WA-ATERFALL

EVERY TEAR
EVERY TEAR
EVERY TEARDROP IS A WATERFALL

EVERY TEAR
EVERY TEAR
EVERY TEARDROP IS A WATERFALL

coldplay new single!!! *jumping around like a child* (actually it’s already 1 week ago since this song first released)

another great lyric by chris martin..like I always said, a song can always cheer you up..it can change tear drop as beautiful as a waterfall

I think the process is like Indian rain dance, you don’t stop dancing until its raining :p
listen to your favorite song every time you feel sad, and don’t stop until your feelings get better..

like I’m doing right now..last area of GFR project, don’t know where to go after this project, my laptop almost (if you can’t say already) broken and many other heavier-problematic-life-stuff..but I’ll keep on dancing and cheer my self up..hey, after all my tear drop will be waterfall..either in good way, or bad one he3..

hmm, 2002..

Love Is Here
By: Starsailor

If you could see the lover in me
And we could join our hands together
If you could see how good it could be
We’ll sing these stupid songs forever

Can you feel it?
Love is here
It has never been so clear
You can’t love what you have not
So hold on to what you’ve got

Is Judy really smiling for me?
I’d change my name in case she found me
Trembling I can’t believe
I’ve got to leave the girl behind me

Can you feel it?
Love is here
It has never been so clear
You can’t love what you have not
So hold on to what you’ve got

If you could see the aching in me
I’d change my name in case you lost me
Trembling down to my knees
I’ve got to leave the world behind me

Can you feel it?
Love is here
It has never been so clear
You can’t love what you have not
So hold on to what you’ve got

aah flashback to early 2002..ha3 falling in love was soo sweeeet, like “nidji” said; “indahnya bercinta saat muda..” This song by starsailor is one of my favorite song.. it’s a unique song, a love song with a sad and a little bit mysterious tone (starsailor signature), and wishful (tend to desperate) lyric..shortly, it’s a mixed feelings-love song

lt’s like when you’re having a crush with someone very much, but you can’t say anything about your feeling (or doesn’t have any bravery to say it), but you keep on hoping that somehow she would know (like i said, desperate hahahaha)

*my mind still wondering in the past..hmm, 2002.. :D *

Love Hurts

today Google is celebrating 117th birthday of Martha Graham (some American dancer, who change the world of dance they say, or whatever) but anyway, cool animation!

this is my song for today:

Love hurts
by: Incubus

Tonight we drink to youth
and holding fast to truth
don’t want to lose what I had as a boy

My heart still has a beat
but love is now a feat
as common as a cold day in LA
Sometimes at night alone I wonder
Is there a spell that I am under
Keeping me from seeing the real thing

Love hurts
but sometimes it’s a good hurt
And it feels like I’m alive

Love sings
When it transcends the bad things
have a heart and try me
‘Cause without love I won’t survive

I’m fettered and abused
Stand naked and accused
should I surface this one man submarine

I only want the truth
So tonight we drink to youth
I’ll never lose what I had as a boy
Sometimes at night alone I wonder
Is there a spell that I am under
Keeping me from seeing the real thing

Love hurts
but sometimes it’s a good hurt
And it feels like I’m alive

Love sings
When it transcends the bad things
have a heart and try me
‘Cause without love I won’t survive

Without love I won’t survive

Love hurts
But sometimes it’s a good hurt
And it feels like I’m alive

Love sings
When it transcends the bad things
have a heart and try me
‘Cause without love I won’t survive

Love hurts, oh
Love hurts
Without love I won’t survive

another one of my close friend just married, I saw their pictures on facebook..and, as usual, that envy, down, sad feelings ambush me..hahahaha soo typical, but I’m not worried coz it’ll disappear soon, like always..

this incubus song is special because it help me get pass through my heartbreak period (hmm, seems so long time ago, but I still like the song)..I remember listening to this song almost every day back then, I have my own play list actually, which all similar like this song, for about 31 songs of more than 2 hours period (hahahahaha, I still try to find that play list somewhere on my old hard disk)

You know, it hard to see other people happy sometimes, specially when you’re not in the same place as they are, but what can you say? that’s life, it’s different for every and each person..you live the life that you choose, no regret, no turning back..life goes forward, always..

about soul mate? hmm, I don’t know if I could ever believe in that again.. I think you could live with someone you choose, you accept them for who they really are..or, you choose to live alone, that’s it..

and about love? well, sometimes you found it, sometimes you lose it, sometimes it makes you smile, but sometime love hurts..

Alive

Alive – P.O.D

Everyday is a new day
I’m thankful for every breath I take
I won’t take it for granted
So I learn from my mistakes
Its beyond my control, sometimes its best to let go
Whatever happens in this lifetime
So I trust in love
You have given me peace of mind

I, I feel so alive for the very first time
I cant deny you
I feel so alive
I, I feel so alive for the very first time
And I think I can fly

Sunshine upon my face
A new song for me to sing
Tell the world how I feel inside
Even though it might cost me everything
And now that I know that it’s beyond my control
It’s like I can never turn my back away
And now that I’ve seen you
I can never look away

I, I feel so alive for the very first time
I cant deny you
I feel so alive
And I think I can fly

Now that I know you..I could never turn my back away
Now that I see you..I could never look away
Now that I see you..I believe no matter what they say

okay this is the song that I want to re-write so many times before but I keep forgot, so while I remember I’ll do it now..first I hear this song was quite sometimes ago, it was the first song of P.O.D that I heard..the vocalist sonny sandoval was so cool I think, a typical hard-rock-band vocalist..but it shocked me when I know that P.O.D is a Christian Metal band..HUH?? really? I said to my self, “hmm, so you can be cool and religious at the same time..” then I’m starting to listen closely to every lyric of their songs, and I understand, they ARE singing praises to the Lord..

Finally I created a quote of my own (hahahaha such a smart-ass): “it’s not how you look, or what people said, that determines who you are..because in the end, you are what you do..”

Makassar,Jambi,Palembang,Bangka,Padang done..coming soon;Bengkulu, Kendari, Sulbar,Ambon,Papua..and last but not least..Bandung..
Sooo exhausted..but hey, I’m alive!!

hidup musik !

ditulis di tengah2 kesibukan gilaK, hari ke 3 begadang, dan persiapan tur sumatra yg sangat tidak gw nantikan

ada waktu dikit nunggu tim DT nyampe lokalisasi nih :p, sorry no english today, my head already (almost) explode! di waktu senggang sekian menit ini, denger musik kenceng2 (make headphone tentunya) lumayan bikin adrenalin naik juga, kayak efek minum kopi mungkin yah (sekali lagi, music always understand me :D )

musik tuh temen yg asik lho , analoginya gini: gw bisa setia sama satu lagu, sambil “flirting” sama beberapa lagu lainnya..dan kalo gw udah bosen loe bisa tinggalin n cari deh lagu baru yg gw suka..kalo sewaktu waktu gw kangen sama lagu tsb,gw bisa denger sesekali..bebas aja, no string attached (inget yah be, ini cuman berlaku sama lagu, ngga untuk yang lain) ha3

musik bisa bawa gw kembali ke masa yg paling berkesan waktu dulu gw denger lagu itu..contohnya kalo gw denger lagu2 starsailor gw jadi inget masa2 kuliah dulu, waktu..aakh jadi panjang dan melebar ntar, intinya mau bahas lagu niih

mulai sekarang gw mau memperbanyak ngebahas lagu2 ah, yg gw suka ajah tapi (he3 ngga profesional bgt gaa sih?) gpp lah toh kan yg baca gw gw juga (terutama di saat ga ada kerjaan gini nih); mulai dari apa yg gw suka dari lagu itu, bagian2 spesialnya, hal2 menarik tentang penyanyinya, albumnya, ataupun kisah di balik lagu tsb baik dari sisi pencipta/penyanyi maupun pendengar (baca: sisi gw) hahahahahahahaha..

pokoknya gw bakalan jadi “pak bondan” nya musik lah.. dari segi sok tau nya tapi, bukan dari segi ahlinya :p
pokona mah, hidup musik !

Waiting For The End

I always love songs…they always understand me, keep companying me at all my time good or bad, and this one stuck in my head lately..

Waiting For The End
by: Linkin Park

This is not the end, this is not the beginning
Just a voice like a riot rocking every revision
But you listen through the tone and the violent rhythm and
Though the words sound steady, something empty within ‘em
We say yeah / with fists flying up in the air
Like we’re holding onto something that’s invisible there
‘Cause we’re living at the mercy of the pain and fear
Until we dead it / forget it / let it all disappear

Waiting for the end to come / wishing I had strength to stand
This was not what I had planned
It’s out of my control
Flying at the speed of light / thoughts were spinning in my head
So many things were left unsaid
It’s hard to let you go

I know what it takes to move on
I know how it feels to lie
All I want to do is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven’t got

Sitting in an empty room / Trying to forget the past
This was never meant to last
I wish it wasn’t so

I know what it takes to move on
I know how it feels to lie
All I want to do is trade this life for something new
Holding on to what I haven’t got

What was left when that fire was gone
I thought it felt right but that right was wrong
All caught up in the eye of the storm
And trying to figure out what it’s like moving on
And I don’t even know what kind of things I said
My mouth kept moving and my mind went dead so
Picking up the pieces now where to begin
The hardest part of ending is starting again

HFAH (His Family Against Her’s)

Today when I’m going to clean up my hard disk I found a file titled “hfah”.. it’s a notepad file, I open it and realize that it was my writing a couple of years ago. And I’m thinking, “hmm, better to post it on my blog before I delete it..” ha3 so that way I can read it and laugh..such a sarcasm life is, I’m trying to wrote something about family, me..like I have one..but anyway, maybe it’s better post it here than let it disappear

his family v.s her’s..

pernah ngerasa kalo loe lebih deket sama keluarga nyokap ketimbang keluarga bokap? ato sebaliknya? (well, lebih sering terjadi kasus yg pertama sih)..terus terang aja gw ngerasain hal ini, dulu2 sih rasanya biasa aja, emang udah dari dulu gw lebih deket sama keluarga dari pihak nyokap, abis keluarga dari bokap nyebelin sih (that’s my honest opinion)..
:D

sampai suatu hari gw denger percakapan antara 2 cewek (sori nulisnya “cewek” dan bukan “cewe”, biar imbang soalnya di bawah ntar gw mo nulis “nenek”, kalo nulisnya “nene” ga bagus aja keliatannya) di travel pas gw mo pergi dari jakarta ke bandung, kira2 gini cuplikkannya (he3, bukan nguping lho, tapi emang mereka ngobrolnya kedengeran sih)

anni (nama ngasal) : “…oo, loe punya nenek juga di jakarta, kok ga pernah main kesana?”
anne (ngasal juga) : “mm, abis gw ga gitu deket sama nenek gw yg dari bokap itu, nyebelin..”
anni : “masa sih gitu?”
anne : “iya, dari dulu nenek gw itu lebih sayang sama anak2nya bude2 gw, sepupu2 gw, yang dibangga-banggain merekaaa mulu..”

dan percakapan mereka berlanjut kira2 satu jam lagi dengan si anne menceritakan betapa lebih menyenangkan keluarga dari pihak nyokapnya ketimbang yg dari pihak bokap. dilanjutkan dengan si anni yang menceritakan teman-nya yg kerja di perusahaan jepang dengan salary puluhan juta perbulan, berikutnya sayup2 gw masih sempet denger mereka bicara soal “di jakarta udah main kemana aja?”, dan di sisa perjalanan gw tidur :p

tapiii, gw cuman tertarik ngebahas persoalan yg pertama..keluarga bokap vs keluarga nyokap..

hmm, sooo typical..banyak temen yg gw kenal juga mengalami hal yang sama (dari cerita2 yang gw denger dari mereka, gw ngambil kesimpulan gitu)..oke, gw emang ngga boleh meng-general-isasi (kata dasar “general”, ditambah awalan meng- dan akhiran -isasi) masalah, kali aja emang bener nenek-nya si anne tuh nyebelin, ato mungkin ada yang bilang : “engga tuh, gw deket2 aja sama keluarga dari pihak nyokap n bokap” (kalo gitu bagus)..

cuman gw heran aja, minimal sama kasus gw sendiri lah..kenapa gw lebih deket sama keluarga dari pihak nyokap? apa emang keluarga pihak bokap nyebelin? trus, kalo emang bener gitu, apa sebabnya?

ini beberapa teori yang gw coba kembang-in (kata dasar “kembang”, diberi akhiran -in..ngaco!) berdasarkan pengalaman pribadi dan cerita2 orang;

1. hampir semua keluarga dari pihak bokap emang jahat, egois, kampungan, bau, jorok, maunya ditolong mulu (kalo masalah yg satu ini pasti sering denger kan? hehehehe), de-es-be..kalo dijelasin satu2 bisa panjang, kayak cerita-nya si anne itu

2. kita lebih sering berkunjung, kumpul2, arisan, ato apapun lah namanya, pokoknya kita lebih sering hang-out bareng keluarga pihak nyokap, jadi kita lebih kenal mereka, lebih tau sifat2 mereka, dan akhirnya secara ga sadar kita “memilih” untuk lebih menyukai mereka

3. frekuensi kumpul antar keluarga mungkin sama (kumpul dengan keluarga pihak nyokap n bokap), tapi kita lebih sering denger cerita2 tidak menyenangkan tentang keluarga dari pihak bokap..i must say, seringkali ibu2 “curhat” tentang “in-law” mereka (baca: keluarga bokap) pada anak2-nya, sehingga “negative image” udah tercipta duluan di benak kita tentang keluarga pihak bokap..sedangkan bokap lebih cenderung jarang bahkan tidak pernah curhat tentang sesuatu sama kita

4. aksi kita di point 2 dan 3 membuat keluarga dari pihak bokap bereaksi seperti point 1 (ga sepenuhnya kayak point 1 sih..tapi ngertilah kan maksudnya)..karena kita bersikap memusuhi mereka secara ga sadar, mereka menunjukkan sikap bermusuhan yang sama..sesuai hukum newton dimana “aksi sama dengan reaksi” dan hukum si pitung “lu jual gua beli”, gw rasa itu adalah hal yang wajar..

dan booom —> suara bom ceritanya..semuanya berujung pada hal yg sama..kita lebih deket sama keluarga nyokap ketimbang (bukan kata dasar “timbang” diberi awalan ke-, tapi ini emang satu kata utuh) keluarga bokap..ini berlangsung dari generasi ke generasi (wuiihh berlebihan bgt yah) sampe ada anekdot “wanita yang paling bebahagia adalah hawa, soalnya ga punya mertua” :D

menurut gw ini harus berubah, minimal kita harus merenungkan lah, apa iya keluarga dari pihak bokap seburuk bayangan kita? soalnya jujur nih, gw sebagai cowok ga mau nanti seandainya punya anak, anak gw itu ga suka sama keluarga gw, apalagi nenek-nya (nyokap gw).. gw pasti bakal sedih kalo itu sampe terjadi..dan untuk memperbaiki hal ini diperlukan kesadaran dan koordinasi yang baik dari berbagai pihak, agar dapat tercipta suasana yang kondusif (kayak pidato kapolri aje)..maksudnya ginih, kita harus lebih bijaksana dan netral dalam menentukan sikap kita kepada keluarga, entah itu pihak bokap ato nyokap, orang-tua dan keluarga besar kita juga mungkin bisa kita kasih pengertian kalo sikap kita tuh netral, ga ada prasangka macem2 dari kita, jadi sikap permusuhan bisa dihentikan..ajukan tawaran damai (dengan lebih banyak berkunjung, lebih mengenal mereka, lebih berkomunikasi-lah pokoknya)

dan kalo-pun hubungan kita dengan salah satu pihak keluarga udah kusuuuuuttt banget, minimal lain kali ada situasi yg ngga ng-enak-in (kata dasar “enak” diberi akhiran..ah garing juga lama2 :p ), kita harus bisa jadi pihak yang arif, bijaksana, cool.. kayak jagoan2 di sinetron2 ituuu, yg walau udah dihina, disiram air, dikurung di kamar mandi, bahkan kadang dijual ke mucikari, tetep ngga dendam..kali aja ntar ujung2nya juga kayak ending sinetron (sinetron2 pas bulan puasa terutama), dimana penjahatnya jadi baik tiba2 di episode terakhir (asal jangan kayak ending sinetron yg penjahatnya mati aja) :p

dan akhirnya untuk masa depan yang lebih baik (halah), terutama untuk temen2 gw yang mau nikah ato yg udah nikah..pliss, jadilah bapak2 dan ibu2 yang bijaksana nantinya..ibu2, mungkin kalo bisa jangan cerita yg jelek2 aja tentang keluarga suami-mu tercinta, cerita yg bagus2nya juga dong ah..bapak2 mungkin bisa dengerin kalo istri lagi curhat soal keluargamu, jgn langsung diajak berantem, ntar males cerita sama kalian, ceritanya sama anak2 kalian, dan lama2..booom —> suara bom lagi ceritanya..mungkin kalo ada ganjelan, bisa dibicarain (dan maksudnya bicarain baik2, ga usah pake urat ngomongnya), mungkin bisa dicari jalan tengahnya..ato mungkin salah satu bisa ngalah (tapi ngalah-nya mesti gantian lho yah)..hahahahaha sok tau gw, lha gw aje belom pernah nikah kok :p

intinya gini, kalo bisa sih kita kenal baik dengan keluarga dari kedua belah pihak orang tua kita, dengan memaklumi berbagai macam sifat mereka yang berbeda-beda..after all, two families are better than one, right? ;)

I’m tired..

5th june, the date that maybe the last time i see you..trying to be strong and come to see the blessing ceremony, but it turns out that i’m not that strong, i’m sorry..

i smiled while looking at you so happy walking on the aisle with him..cos i am, i’m really happy for you..still, a small voice cried: “why can’t you be the one who walk with her there?”..try not to listen to it..so i stepped forward, busying myself taking picture of you, and also so that she won’t see tears almost drop from my eyes.. i don’t to hurt her, i don’t want her to know that i’m still in love with the girl who’s standing there in front of me, who look so beautiful, which her wedding i’m attending..it just too sad..

our friends came, i try to laugh, introduce her to them, take her by her hand, try to realize what i have now, realize my position..choices i’ve made..that voice came again: “don’t you know that you will never able to fill the hole inside your heart?” i shout: “shut up! i’m happy now”..but i can’t lie..i never understand why am i so sad losing something i never really had?

God, why it still hurt so much? my heart feels like it going to explode..what kind of feeling is this? take it away now..please, i can’t stand it anymore..i’m tired..

sacrifice for a greater good..

tonight i was intending to watch alice in wonderland 3D premiere, but instead i end up watching confucius (a chinese movie)..nothing special about the movie actually, but there’s one good quote by confucius; “if a man can’t change the world, at least he can try to change himself..” (or something like that).

this words stuck in my head, coz eventually yesterday i was just having a deep thinking about corruption matters in this country..the problem is, why they keep doing that? aren’t their monthly paycheck more than enough? is it the basic nature of human? to be greed? or is it the society condition on this country which forms everyone’s opinion that successful is ALWAYS measured by money? but then even if this question answered, is there anything we can do to change it? if there’s nothing can be done, then questioning it from the beginning is just nonsense. even bigger and frightening question appear in my heart? am i one of this corrupt people?

either we realize it or not, we can be corruptor in our own world..our family, our working place, our community..even sometimes we are corruptor in God’s eye..when we delay our job even though we can do it immediately, only because we’re not ‘in the mood’..when we sacrifice our family’s needs just so our personal happiness could be achieved..or when we complaining to God how hard life is when all He gives us is His bless..whew, then i’m definitely a corruptor myself..

but then hey i think there’s still hope, i realize if i can’t change the world since i am no one, at least i can try to change myself..this task is hard, but it’s not too hard (at least not as hard as changing the world isn’t it?) :D
and something struck me; that a change need sacrifice,sacrifice for a greater good..